Hitching and Roadhead

 I don't like "having" to hitchhike, seems to be when you have the worst luck. But some Summer days, if ya gotta get there, hitchhiking is kind of pleasant, for a little wander-lust.

So this older, halfway-gruff, fella stopped. 

"Y'all going far?"

"Ardmore, 'bout 70 miles."

"Hell, you may as well hop on in, then."

I got in and he barely had the car back in lane. "Want a snort?" He waved a paper bag-wrapped flask at me.

"Oh! No sir. Last time I drank, my friends posted naked pics of me, and claimed I was smoking pole on anyone that wanted!"

"Oh. This is peppermint Schnapps, I just use it to freshen my breath."

"Maybe for that...." I guzzled a good double-shot.

"Careful son. It's really 99 Peppermints...."

I'll say, I was already seeing stars.

He popped a sip. "So how'd you end up sucking all that dick?"

"I don't even remember doing it. They could just be Joshing with me." I lied.

(Let's face it. I'll suck the dick of a weary soldier, after he spends 3 days on a bus!)

"Are they the type that makes that kind of shit up?" He passed me the bag again. I sipped more carefully, while acting more loopy.

"That's just it, they're not. But, I remember we all pulled off our pants at the riverside bonfire. I remember all of us dicks-swinging, balls hanging, and drinkin'.

"So, I'm afraid if I drink too much and any dicks appear, I'll  be on my knees, too soon!"

I noticed he'd taken a slower, quieter, if parallel, older Highway.

I faked another guzzle, "I don't know how I ended up telling you, ...a complete stranger."

"Awe, don't worry 'bout that, they say confession is good for the soul. I'm Bill."

I took a snort. "Sam."

"There's  a roadside picnic area ahead. I gotta stretch my legs."

"I'm good" ... and stayed in the car.

He opened the back door...."to block onlookers," and my door, "from both directions. If you stay put, I promise not to piss on ya."

He pulled out his kinda average dick. Cut, 3-4 inches, etc...and started pissing. Wasn't beautiful, Wasn't particularly bad looking...just meh. I could take it or leave it.

I took a swig.

"How does this compare to all your buddies'?"

"Some were big and some were small, but, They had their balls out, being pantsless...."

"Hell, that's solvable!" He reached in and yanked out a bull's pair.

"Damn, Bill! You've got bigger cods than I've ever seen on a human!"

I don't know why, but I realized I was lifting and pawing at that dangling sac, feeling the duck eggs inside, rolling around.

"Better stop. You being drunk and all."

"Fuck that! I'm not drunk! (Faking a fresh guzzle) I want to get a taste of their cum-power!"

I was suckin' on his crank before any further protests.

(Unbeknownst to me, he signalled the approaching truck, to look, he's getting head.)

I heard air brakes, since it wasn't  a cop-car yelp, I just kept on.

A half-handsome young (I say young, he was probably closer to 28,) ginger trucker wandered up to watch.

"He says he sucks dick, if he gets drunk."

"Looks drunk to me, what with that ole dick in his mouth and all, damn! Will you look at those nuts swing!"

He unzipped and started stroking his 6-thick, alabaster, uncut handful.

"He loves m' balls."

"Why not, that's quite a set!"

He pulled out his shrunken little hot pink scrotum, with bright red hairs all over it. 

My eyes got big, and apparently mouth got tighter, because Bill just hosed my whole mouth with his copper-tasting-gold.

"My turn. Hey, don't go too far, I wanna feel them Angus-balls before ya put 'em away."

Sam had his camera-phone out, the trucker's dick was in my face, Bill's nuts in the trucker's hand. "My buddies won't believe this shit! Do ya mind?"

My mouth was too full to utter, "no."

"Hell, no dick is in my face, go for it." Approved the trucker.

I felt the semi-hard shaft peeling, and unpeeling; but, the second he'd gotten a hold of a handful of Bill's nuts...he got outright rock solid!

I bit my lips around his firm pipe, til my lips were nearly bleeding inside, I could stand no more.

I sucked loud and slurpy, trying to suck the trucker's mini-pistachios out of his scrotum, thru the tube, to freedom in my mouth...

His originally white rod, was turning more pink and red, as he hefted those 5 lb balls., from the blood rushing in, that could be seen through the thin pale skin.

I heard him tense, and felt him spasm, but, his disappointing amount of love juice, kinda ruined it for me. I almost got no flavor payoff.

His dick was quite a showpiece...but, the nuts had no substance.

As we broke up the roadside picnic, I told Bill to keep his nuts out while we drive, and I'd keep his dick in my minty-fresh mouth.

Petting those velvet-sacced potatoes was dreamy. The no frills dick, didn't even erectify formerly 10 miles...by then, I was in a dreamscape feeling avocados at a market, while the sample-lady kept shoving hot-dog wieners into my mouth.

"Hey, Sam, we're here."

I'd  been relaxing the rest of the way to Ardmore, reflecting a day half-blown.

I sat up as we passed a 'Welcome to Ardmore' sign.

"Again, thanks for the dick sucking," he sincerely added.

I saw the meat openly displayed out of his fly..."Oh no, not again." I halfway-lamented.

If you enjoy my BJ/JO storytelling,  tell your buddies, (if not shoot me an email.)

If you've  had similar experiences, comment below.